Sport can offer children so much more than physical activity. It can teach teamwork, perseverance, problem-solving, and resilience. It can also provide a sense of belonging, confidence, and enjoyment.

But for some children, sport gradually becomes less about having fun and more about performing well.

They start worrying about making mistakes, letting their team down, disappointing their coach, or not meeting their own expectations. What was once exciting can begin to feel stressful.

A certain amount of nervousness before a game or competition is completely normal. In fact, it often reflects that a child cares about what they're doing. Problems arise when those nerves become so intense that they interfere with confidence, enjoyment, or participation.

The good news is that there are practical ways adults can help.

Focus on effort rather than results
​Children have little control over many aspects of sport. They cannot control who they are competing against, how other players perform, the referee's decisions, or the final score.

What they can control is their effort, attitude, preparation, and willingness to keep trying. When adults focus primarily on outcomes, children can begin to believe that winning is what matters most.
Instead, try noticing the things that sit within your child's control.

For example:
"I loved how you kept trying even when the game got tough."
"You showed great teamwork today."
"I could see how hard you worked."

These messages help children develop confidence that is based on effort and growth rather than results.

Help children understand that nerves are normal
Many children interpret nervous feelings as a sign that something is wrong.

They may think:
"If I feel nervous, I won't play well."
"Everyone else seems confident except me."

In reality, most athletes experience nerves before competition. You can help by normalising these feelings.

Explain that butterflies in the stomach, sweaty hands, and a racing heart are simply signs that the body is getting ready for action.

The goal isn't to get rid of nerves completely. The goal is to help children learn that they can perform even when nerves are present.

Teach simple calming strategies
When children are feeling anxious, simple strategies are usually more effective than complicated ones.

Encourage your child to practise skills such as:

• Taking a few slow breaths before a game
• Using encouraging self-talk
• Focusing on one small task at a time
• Visualising a positive moment from training or a previous game

These tools work best when they are practised regularly rather than introduced for the first time on competition day.

Keep sport in perspective
For children who are highly invested in their sport, it can be easy for one performance to feel enormously important.

Parents can help by reminding children that sport is only one part of who they are. A missed goal, dropped catch, or disappointing result does not define their worth.

The lessons they learn through sport, persistence, teamwork, courage, and sportsmanship, often matter far more than the outcome of any individual game.

Make sure there is still room for fun
When sport becomes all about performance, children can lose touch with the reasons they started playing in the first place.

Opportunities for informal play, backyard games, kicking a ball around with friends, or simply enjoying movement without competition can help reconnect children with the fun side of sport.

When enjoyment returns, confidence often follows.

What parents say matters
One of the most influential conversations happens in the car ride home after a game.

Many children worry about what their parents will say after a performance. Sometimes the most powerful question is simply:

"Did you have fun?"
Or:
"What was your favourite part?"

These questions communicate that your interest in their experience goes beyond the scoreboard.

Sport can be a wonderful environment for children to learn and grow. But children thrive when they feel supported rather than judged, encouraged rather than evaluated.

By helping children focus on effort, understand their nerves, and keep competition in perspective, we create the conditions for confidence to grow. Most importantly, we help ensure that sport remains something they enjoy rather than something they fear.

If your child's anxiety about sport is affecting their confidence, enjoyment, performance, or willingness to participate, additional support may help. Our psychologists offer individual sports psychology appointments to help young athletes build confidence, manage nerves, develop coping strategies, and perform at their best while maintaining a healthy relationship with sport.
Appointments are available in Werribee and via Telehealth. To learn more or request an appointment, visit www.hopscotchandharmony.com.au/booknow

As children grow up, participating in sports can be an excellent way to develop physical and social skills. However, for some children, the idea of participating in sports can bring about feelings of anxiety and nervousness. It can be challenging for parents to know how to support their child when they are experiencing anxiety in these situations. In this blog post, we'll explore the different ways that children may experience anxiety when playing sport and how Hopscotch and Harmony Psychology can help.

Causes of Anxiety in Sport

There are many reasons why children might experience anxiety when playing sport. Some common causes include:

• Fear of failure: Children may be worried about not performing well in front of others, which can lead to feelings of embarrassment.
• Pressure from parents or coaches: Parents or coaches may put pressure on children to perform, which can make them feel stressed.
• Fear of getting hurt: Children may be worried about getting injured while playing sport.
• Social anxiety: Children may feel anxious about being around other people and worry about what others might think of them.
• Lack of confidence: Children who lack confidence in their abilities may feel anxious about participating in sports.

Symptoms of Anxiety in Sport

It's essential to recognise the symptoms of anxiety in children when playing sport so that you can support them. Some of the signs of anxiety include:

• Difficulty sleeping or nightmares
• Nausea or stomach aches
• Avoidance of activities related to the sport
• Irritability or mood swings
• Crying or expressing fear
• Refusing to go to training or games
• Decreased interest in the sport they are playing

Ways to Help Children with Anxiety in Sport

There are several ways that parents and coaches can help children experiencing anxiety when playing sport.

1. Encourage and support your child. It's important to let your child know that you are proud of them, regardless of how they perform. Encourage them to try their best, but don't put pressure on them to win or be perfect.
2. Create a safe and positive environment. Make sure that your child feels safe and comfortable when playing sport. Encourage positive interactions with coaches, teammates, and other parents.
3. Practice relaxation techniques. Teach your child relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing, visualisation, or meditation, to help them manage their anxiety.
4. Seek professional help. If your child's anxiety is severe, consider seeking help from a psychologist. A psychologist can work with your child to develop coping skills and manage their anxiety.

Conclusion

Anxiety is a common experience for children when playing sport. It's important to keep an eye out for symptoms and understand the causes so that you can support your child. By creating a safe and positive environment, encouraging your child, teaching relaxation techniques, and seeking professional help when needed, you can help your child manage their anxiety and enjoy participating in sports.

Jacob Spinks. Psychologist