 If you’re considering taking your child to see a psychologist, it pays to prepare them. Here are 10 useful pointers to consider: 1. Involve them The important point to raise here is to actually ensure that your child is aware of their session, prior to attending. A common mistake parents make is not telling their child, or telling them at the last minute (such as when driving to the appointment). This is often with the best of intentions, as parents hope to reduce any undue worry or resistance about attending, however it is often counterproductive. Like all of us, unfamiliar situations can trigger worried thoughts. If your child has no idea what the appointment is about, or what a psychologist does, their brains will attempt to make sense of it, which often results in negatively distorted beliefs or assumptions. For example, your child may see a psychologist in the same way as an authority figure, like a teacher, and believe that they are getting into trouble because they are "bad". Or they may see a psychologist more like a doctor, and worry they will be subjected to medical tests, given medication or a needle. As you can see, it’s important to ensure that your child knows what the appointment is about and what a psychologist does, to avoid any misconceptions. We want to ensure they have a positive experience of help- seeking; if their first experience of help-seeking is one fraught with confusion, anxiety, and negative beliefs, then you may encounter resistance to them attending further sessions. 2. Use simple explanations To explain the role of the psychologist, keep it clear and simple. Introduce the role of a psychologist as someone who can help people of all ages with things like big feelings or difficulties at home or at school. Explain that the psychologist helps people find ways to cope with these feelings or difficulties, as well as helping them to feel better within themselves and within their relationships (i.e. friends, home, school). For children, point out that they will have fun with the psychologist too! They will get a chance to play and be creative. 3. Gently touch on the difficulties Add what you have noticed they are struggling with. For example, you might have noticed they are avoiding school, or perhaps they are finding it hard to manage anger at home. Gently mention what your concern is, but ensure the conversation is not a disciplinary one, meaning that you do not demonise their behaviour or send the message that "something is wrong with you", which places the weight of the issues on them. Phrase your concerns as "difficulties". For example, "I have noticed you're having difficulty with (state the challenge) at the moment, and a psychologist can help us with this". 4. Normalise Every human being experiences emotional, behavioural, and social difficulties throughout their life. Normalise your child's struggle as part of being human! It can help to share your own experience of difficulties with your child, for example, "Hey I was nervous about school too", or "Sometimes I have days I can’t control my anger too". This normalises and humanises their experience, and helps them to see that everyone struggles, even grown-ups. If you have seen a psychologist yourself, it can help to share this with them, and tell them a couple things it helped you with. 5. Give them a "mental map" of what to expect To alleviate nerves about attending a new place and meeting a new person, give your child an idea about what to expect from their session, such as what time their session is, how long it will go for, where you will be (i.e. in the session with them, or in the nearby waiting room), and the name of their therapist. If you have already met with the therapist, you might like to share your impression of them (e.g. "they were easy to talk to", or "they go for the same football team as you!"). Most clinics have photos and a brief description of psychologist on their website, which you could share with your child if they are curious. 6. Comfort tools Some children like to bring toys, games, or sensory tools with them to the session as a way to help them feel more at ease, and self regulate if needed. You may wish to ask your child if they'd like to bring something along as a comfort tool, or even as a bit of "show and tell" to enable their psychologist to get to know them better. 7. Working together, not in isolation It’s important for your child to know they are not doing this alone. I often talk about working together as a "support team", where the child, parents, psychologist, and sometimes other people like siblings, are all going to work together to get a better handle on the issues. The issues do not resolve simply through the attendance of therapy sessions; an important part of the work occurs outside of session, based on the implementation of strategies at home, school, etc. So remind your child that you're in this with them! 8. After the session It's okay to check-in with your child about how they’re feeling, and whether or not they would like to talk about anything from the session, but make sure not to interrogate or push them to disclose (if you require more information about how privacy and confidentiality works for child clients, please speak with their psychologist). If your child requires a calming activity to transition from their session into the next task of their day, such as returning to school, it can help to go for a short walk outside, play a game, or enjoy a snack or drink together. 9. Resistance Therapy can be difficult for all ages, as it often involves working on behavioural changes, sitting with discomfort, and processing painful memories, feelings, and insights. It makes sense then, that some people would resist it, especially children who are geared towards pleasure and reward! So naturally, some resistance is to be expected. However, if you notice an ongoing pattern of resistance to attending sessions, ask your child about it. There could be other reasons to explain it. Perhaps they don't think they need help, and feel resentful that they are being "forced" to go. Maybe they are not ready to reveal their thoughts and feelings. Or perhaps they just don't "click" with the therapist. All reasons are valid and worth hearing. So rather than ignoring the resistance, listen to your child, and raise any concerns about their engagement with the therapist. 10. Don't aim for perfect! As a parent, you are not expected to know exactly how therapy "works", or to give the perfect description of the therapy process to your child! Keep it calm, kind, and simple. Leave all of the finer details to the therapist. Overall, the pointers I have raised here simply ensure that your child has some awareness of what they'll be walking into, rather than it being a big "unknown". This goes a long way to reducing any unnecessary worry, and promoting positive engagement in the very beginning. A final note: Therapy is a useful tool, yet your love, care, and non-judgmental "noticing" of your child's distress is the first and most important step in the therapy process.  Hilary Sanders is a psychologist at Hopscotch and Harmony Belmont who is passionate about supporting people of all ages, however has a particular interest in working with adolescents and adults. Hilary values diversity, and encourages individuals to celebrate their uniqueness- she believes human difference is what makes life interesting!
 Are you concerned about your child or teenager and aren’t sure if a psychologist is right for them?
Psychologists can help people in many different ways and support looks different for each individual. A psychologist can provide a range of support and guidance for young people who are experiencing emotional, behavioural, or mental health issues. When you take your child to see a psychologist, they will work with you to create specific treatment goals tailored to your child’s individual needs and challenges. Here are some ways that a psychologist can help your child: Assessing and diagnosing mental health conditions: A psychologist can conduct assessments to diagnose mental health conditions, such as anxiety, depression, ADHD, or eating disorders, which can help guide treatment and support for your child. Developing coping skills: A psychologist can work with your child to develop healthy coping skills for managing difficult emotions, such as anxiety or anger, which can help them feel more confident and resilient in the face of challenges. Providing therapy: A psychologist can provide therapy for your child to help them work through specific issues or challenges, such as difficulty with social relationships or school-related stress. Teaching problem-solving and decision-making skills: A psychologist can teach your child effective problem-solving and decision-making skills, which can help them navigate difficult situations and make healthy choices. Providing parenting support and guidance: A psychologist can work with you as a parent to provide support and guidance for helping your child develop healthy habits and coping strategies. Remember, it's important to approach the topic of seeking help with warmth, empathy, and understanding. By doing so, you can help your child feel more comfortable and supported as they navigate their emotional well-being. Overall, a psychologist can provide unique support and guidance for your child based on their individual needs, and can work collaboratively with you and your child to help them develop the skills and resources they need to thrive.  Starting therapy can be scary, especially if you and your child have never done it before. What is going to happen? What am I going to be doing? What am I going to be talking about? Will I like my therapist? Will my psychologist like me? For children, many new experiences can cause emotional responses due to the fear of the unknown. However, there are some things you can do to help prepare your child for their first therapy session to help reduce their worries. Let your child know they are going to see a therapist: a few days before the appointment, sit down with your child during a calm moment and let them know they (and you!) will be going to see a therapist together. Explain the purpose of therapy using simple language, letting them know that therapy is a way for them to talk about their feelings and problems with someone who can help them. Normalize therapy: Let children know that many people go to therapy, and it is not something to be ashamed of. Be positive, encouraging and reassure your child that they can be honest with their therapist because they want to help them. Preparing for the first session: Let your child know what to expect in their first session. At Hopscotch and Harmony, this will generally involve meeting the therapist in a special, safe room, playing games or doing activities, and the therapist asking questions to get to know more about the child. Involve the child in the process: Involve the child in the therapy process by letting them choose a favourite toy or game to bring to sessions or giving them some control over the therapy goals. This can help them feel more comfortable and invested in the process. You can also look at your therapist’s biography on Hopscotch and Harmony’s website to let you child become familiar with the therapist they will be seeing. And of course, your therapist will do everything they can to make sure your child feels comfortable, and safe when they arrive. |
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Hopscotch & HarmonyAt Hopscotch & Harmony Psychology, you can expect compassionate care and evidence-based guidance on your journey to wellness.
With clinics in Werribee and Belmont, as well as providing online counselling to clients who live throughout Australia, our dedicated team of psychologists and dietitians are committed to providing support to children, teenagers and adults. With a focus on understanding your unique needs, we offer tailored solutions to foster growth and resilience. Trust in our experience and dedication as we work together towards your well-being. Welcome to a place where healing begins and possibilities abound. |
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Contact usHopscotch & Harmony
Child, Teen and Adult Psychology Our Locations:
WERRIBEE: 1/167-179 Shaws Rd
BELMONT: 92 Roslyn Rd AUSTRALIA-WIDE: Online counselling 
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Hopscotch and Harmony respectfully recognise the Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people as the first Peoples of the continent now called Australia. We acknowledge the Bunurong and Wadawurrung people of the Kulin Nation, the traditional owners of the land on which we work, and pay our respects to their Elders, past and present.
We proudly support the LGBTQIA+ community and welcome people of all identities and families into our practice.
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