What to Know About Puberty's Effects on Pre-Teen Emotions and Actions

Are you the parent of a pre-teen and are unsure of how to approach the often awkward or uncomfortable conversation about puberty? It is great to feel prepared and informed about going into this conversation so you and your pre-teen can feel safe and supported to learn and grow together. 

Puberty can have significant effects on the emotions of teenagers and pre-teens. During puberty, the body undergoes many physical and hormonal changes, which can affect the way they feel and behave.

Here are some ways that puberty can impact emotions in teens:

1. Mood swings: Hormonal changes during puberty can cause teenagers to experience sudden and intense mood swings. They may feel happy and excited one moment, and then become sad or irritable the next. This can be tricky to navigate as a parent!
2. Anxiety and depression: Puberty can also increase the risk of anxiety and depression in teenagers. Hormonal changes, social pressures, and other factors can contribute to feelings of sadness, hopelessness, and worry.
3. Increased sensitivity to stress: The changes that occur during puberty can make teenagers more sensitive to stress. They may become easily overwhelmed and feel like they are unable to cope with the demands of school, family, or social life.
4. Heightened self-consciousness: As teenagers go through physical changes, they may become more self-conscious about their appearance. They may feel awkward or uncomfortable in their changing bodies and worry about how they are perceived by others.
5. Changes in sexuality: Puberty can also bring about changes in sexuality and sexual attraction. This can be confusing and emotional for teenagers as they navigate their feelings and relationships.

Here are some steps you can take to talk to your child about puberty:

1. Start the conversation early: It's best to start talking about puberty before your child starts experiencing the changes. This can help them feel more prepared and less anxious when the changes do occur. You can begin the conversation around age 8 or 9, or earlier if your child has questions.
2. Create a safe and comfortable environment: Choose a private and comfortable place to have the conversation, where your child feels safe and free to ask questions. Make sure you have enough time to have a relaxed conversation without interruptions.
3. Use age-appropriate language: Use simple and age-appropriate language when discussing puberty. Avoid using technical terms or language that may confuse your child.
4. Explain what puberty is: Explain to your child that puberty is a natural process that happens to everyone as they grow up. It's a time when their body goes through many physical changes, such as growth spurts, changes in body hair, and developing sexual characteristics.
5. Address emotional changes: Puberty can also bring emotional changes, such as mood swings and increased sensitivity. Discuss these changes with your child and let them know that it's normal to feel different emotions during this time.
6. Answer questions: Encourage your child to ask questions and provide honest and straightforward answers. If you don't know the answer to a question, let your child know that you will find out and get back to them.

It's important for parents, caregivers, and educators to understand these emotional changes and provide support and guidance for teenagers during this time. Encouraging open communication, without judgment and providing a safe and supportive environment will foster your child’s wellbeing. Seeking professional help when needed can be helpful for pre-teens and teenagers during puberty as it can be difficult for them to speak to close family members about this often awkward topic. 

Parents and caregivers are valuable during this time as they can model healthy emotional expression and coping skills such as stating their emotions and engaging in self care. When parents/caregivers take care of their own mental wellbeing, they can better support their pre-teens. Everyone goes through puberty and emotional changes are expected and we all know it can be a tricky time, however these steps can help your child  feel safe and supported. 

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